HIT. AND. RUN.

Negative. Tragic. Sad. Angry. Unexpected. Fateful. Trauma. Sudden. Gratitude. Fight. Tremble. Blessings. Forgiveness. Survival. Toxic. Fear.

FEAR.  Oh yeah!  Now that's a HUGE ONE, eh?  Yep.  Good ole FEAR.  Sure to make you stop dead in your tracks.  At least for a moment.  What is your reaction to fear?  Do you notice anything in your physical body when you are experiencing fear?  Does fear sometimes disguise itself and come out in another way for you?  Fear is a sneaky lil booger!  But valuable, nonetheless, when used appropriately.  :)

Anyway.....did I digress again?  lol

As you may have guessed, I'm practicing a technique :)

See - I've come to realize - I need to work on my relationship with the phrase, "hit and run."  Cuz, every time someone says it, I feel my solar plexus contract.  Cringe, even.  And then it heads for my throat chakra and goes straight to the jugular.  And then that blasted whatever-it-is tries to strangle me!  Huff!  I've also noticed that, in conversation, I tend to leave out that little detail about my accident...the "hit and run" part.  I guess I don't even want that phrase in my mouth.  And on those occasions when I'm somewhat forced to disclose the details - the other party's reaction to that phrase ain't so good either.

Yeah, there's definitely a negative implication tied to the phrase "hit and run."  Not just for me, but for anyone.  No doubt about it.  And, I certainly don't want to lose my sense of empathy or compassion for other victims I see on TV or read about in the newspaper.  No, I don't want to do that at all.   But I would like to turn down the hit and run negative impact dial just a tad...

Vic-tim - noun - a person or thing that suffers harm, death, etc., from another or from some adverse act, circumstance, etc.

This suggests that something has happened to you/me/us that we had absolutely zero control over, right? And we suffered for it - do I have that right? You're damn right!  And it's true.  And not fair.  And we don't like it.  And rightfully so!

On the other hand - be it truth or not - be our feelings justifiable or not - I'm not gonna let victimhood DEFINE or CONTROL me, are you?  No way.  No how.  I am so much bigger than victimhood.  I am bigger than any negative thing that has ever happened to me.  And, I can wear those experiences like charms on a charm bracelet - reminders of the lessons I have learned - but I'm certainly not gonna wear any of them like a huge, heavy, winter cloak!  In fact, I'm not gonna wear anything like a huge, heavy, winter cloak ever again!  (Yes, you heard it here first *smiles*) 

Here's what Carl Jung (one of my favs) has to say on the subject:

"I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become."

What a brilliant and powerful statement that is!  Wish I'd thought of it!  lol


So...I dunno...I have this crazy wild hair to attempt the impossible, yet again.  Because, well, I'm just stubborn like that :)

For our next trick, folks - I shall attempt to change my relationship with "hit and run."  It could take some time.  So maybe go get yourself a beer and some swag or sumn...

Back to my list of emotions.  These are all the thoughts and feelings that arise when I see or hear the phrase, "hit and run."  Some of them are good, right?  So...I could choose to just focus on the good ones and shoo away the others I suppose.  Meh.  Emotion shooing is so last year :)  Nah.  I'll just sit here with them for a spell instead - all of them.

Maybe I'll imagine I'm at the beach with my sandchair in the water, just the way I like it :)  And all those thoughts and emotions and words will flow in and out with the tide.  One will rush beneath my chair, causing it to sink, and almost toppling it over (with me in it).  The next may barely grace my toes, scattering bursting seafoam bubbles all about like ethereal glitter .  Some will carry jagged shells and rocks that nick my feet; followed by others that gently cleanse and smooth them over.  Yep.  I'm just gonna sit here with my fruity umbrella drink and let them all come and go as they may.  I'm fine, really :)  Then.....just when that Glorious Sunshine Sandwoman lulls me off to the Land of Blessed Bliss.....

WHAM!

CRASH!

SWOOSH!

The Grand Tsunami!  It's the BIG ONE, folks!  The Grand Tsunami of F-E-A-R!

Woman down at MP 7!  lol

There goes my margarita!  AND my book!  AND my beach bag and towel and *cough* my bathing suit top!

Even so, much to my surprise, and maybe yours too, I haven't drown yet!  Ha! Survival of the fittest, yanno! :D

*
*
*
*
*
*
*

Hey! I faced all those emotions and lived to tell about it!  I didn't shoo.  I didn't bury.  I didn't avoid.  I sat with them.  Allowed them to rise and fall, and even "have their way with me" so to speak.  And, as far as the Great Tsunami of Fear goes - while I may have looked like a piece of t.p. swirling down the toilet, I'm still standing!  (Topless and tousled perhaps, but standing nonetheless!) 

Meanwhile......back at the bungalow.......

Where was I again?  lol

Ahhhh.  Yes...  Hit. And. Run.   Somehow, it doesn't seem quite as powerful now...not as much umph as before.  In fact, while I know I'll always feel some sense of sadness when I hear it, I just may choose to redefine it for myself.  I already have a few ideas brewing :)

• a handmade card or care package in the mail - for no reason at all = HAR
• a tea date with a friend, after too many lost days and months and years = HAR
• "thinking of you - no response required" texts = HAR
• helping a stranger I'll most likely never see again = HAR
• and more, which shall remain confidential :)

Who knows?  I may even do something really out there like put sticky notes all over the house.

HIT. AND. RUN.  TLYTC style.  Tag - you're it!

my Seasons of Life charm bracelet